Click Submit — Voila PUBLISHED AUTHOR!

The internet is truly like an asylum at times.    You can be whatever you want to be with a few strokes of the keyboard.  Being as such, unless you do some research you really don’t know who is the real deal and who is just a wannabe.   I have realized that there are a lot of people who like to embellish who they are.  This is especially true of up and coming or wanna be authors/true crime groupies.  I have never claimed to have expertise or embellished my qualifications.  I am just a blogger.  I write because I enjoy doing so, and if someone swings by my blog and leaves accolades for a well-written piece – then that’s okay, too.  But I don’t run around pimping this blog or pretending to be someone I am not.  There are, however, those who DO.

Recently, someone claiming to be a “published author” left some rather snarky comments here and questioned why I dared to write a piece on profiling without expertise in the area.  Uhh, because I can?  My blog has never claimed to be an expert on anything.  I wrote an opinion piece and I provided factual commentary from the FBI regarding their definition of pseudoexperts.  This person flashed her e-credentials like a badge of honor and thought that you, dear reader, would swoon at her glory!  Not so.  My issue regarding implied credibility and pseudoexperts is one that others share.  Just because you write that you are a published author does not make it so.  Being “published”, one assumes that the work is PUBLISHED by a real publisher or by academia.  However, I and PUBLISHED authors are obviously mistaken in our judgment, as supposedly when you click “submit” at your wordpress blog or on your website…voila!!  You are now a PUBLISHED AUTHOR!!! 

I decided to seek out expert opinion regarding this controversy and I enlisted the assistance of Burl Barer.  Burl received an Edgar Award for his book The Saint, and was praised by Pulitzer Prize nominee Jack Olsen for “writing true crime at its best.”  His professional biography reads:

Professional Biography

Burl Barer is a Edgar Award winning author and two-time Anthony Award nominee with extensive media, advertising, marketing, and public relations experience.
Garnering accolades for his creative contributions to radio, television, and print media, Barer’s career has been highlighted in The Hollywood Reporter, London Sunday Telegraph, New York Times, USA Today, Variety, Broadcasting, Electronic Media, ABC’s Good Morning America, Investigation Discovery’s “Deadly Women,” and “Snapped” on the Oxygen Network. He also hosts TRUE CRIMES on OUTLAW RADIO with famed attorney Don Woldman.

Burl is credentialed and quite capable of giving a professional opinion on what a “published author” is.  He, as well as others, have worked very hard to hone their craft and to imply that posting your work on a blog somehow credentials you as a published author is very unfair to him and other authors.  Here is what he had to say about this type of “published” work.

…professional writers don’t refer to themselves as “published authors” — what other kind is there? Pre-published? WTF is THAT? That is a fancy way of saying “i have not been paid, and no one is buying…yet”

Creative writing is a lot like sex. You spend more time thinking about it than doing it, and rejection is the standard response to your attempts to penetrate the market. Now, here is an easy analogy. If you have sex with 47 itinerant farm workers in one afternoon — just for the fun of it — you may be termed “daring,” “adventurous” or “slut” but you have no right to call yourself a whore unless you are paid. If you are paid AND it is filmed or video taped, you are no longer a whore, you are now an adult film actress. If this video becomes a bit hit, you are now a Porn Star. If there was no film in the camera, and no video tape in the machine, and you only were paid cab fare to the warehouse where th 47 farm workers were awaiting you, you will most likely justify the effort expended by terming yourself a pre-released adult entertainer fresh from a extensive series of auditions for a variety of positions in the industry.

People give themselves titles that boost their self-image, and select the appellations they hope are self-fulfilling prophecies.

In closing, when Truman Capote was asked what he thought of Harold Robbins‘ writing, he responded, “Harold Robbins doesn’t write, he types.” Maybe that’s the term for the unpaid bloggers with higher aspirations…Published Typist.

So, there ya’ have it.  I’m going to hit submit now.


Prinnie the “Published Typist”

PS:  Go buy some of Burl’s books.

Author, activist, lover of all animals and a few people.

Defend speech because it’s free; not because you agree with it.
You can now purchase a book of the screenshots that were gathered during my research of the case and see the reasons I was so upset about what was happening in Steubenville.

prinnie – who has written posts on

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  1. RadioDeJay

    Someone on Twitter recently posted that Google is your best friend. Well I decided to try it. I copy and pasted the following on google: “Just because you write that you are a published author does not make it so” . Here is one of my results that I found interesting :’t-make-it-so
    The name of the article is : Just Because You Say You are Doesn’t Make it So

    I advise those who don’t believe what was posted above to read this or use “Google” to verify the truth before opening their mouths. Well off I go Time for me to Google “TUNA!”

  2. elena mitchell

    Now that was funny, it made me Snort. But I wouldn’t know what to call it in real terms. Like you I am a Published Typist. I don’t much care if I bore the arse off everyone because I enjoy putting words on the proverbial paper. So keep it coming. This Blog is a welcomed new addition to my very boring life.

  3. JunieTuney

    I love it you publish your typing so well. I sure got a laugh out of this and Burl Barer’s books do look interesting. I will see what my local library has on its’ shelves. Thanks for all your typing!

  4. Burl Barer, America's Favorite Lipless Old Jew

    Remember BOXCAR WILLIE? He was known as “America’s Favorite Hobo!”
    I don’t recall voting in the Favorite Hobo competition, but I would sure like to know who came in second place.

  5. Jenny — Save up your allowance and buy one of my books new. Authors don’t make a cent when you read our books at the library. I like libraries, and librarians are hot — we all know the secret life of librarians is no secret — but $6.99 for one of my masterpieces is less than taking the kids out for a Big Mac and a Coke.

    1. JunieTuney

      It’s Juney not Jenny.. gotta have an eye for detail but this old lady has a terminal disease and you know how well SSDI pays. You get a 3.5 percent raise then your drug premium goes up another 35.00 a month and higher co-pays and you live SSDI check to SSDI check. I hear you about not making money off libraries but I pay that it my property taxes otherwise I’d be on the street. No kids and don’t do McDonalds. Cancer sucks big time. If I could I would support your efforts you seem like a very interesting author and I would love to support your efforts but can’t at the present time till I win the lottery! Bon Chance Juney!

  6. behindtheyellowtape

    Awesome article and Burl’s (Burl You Rock!!!)contribution was freaking hilarious. Had me laughing hard. I was almost making an ass of myself in the coffee shop where I was reading this. It Was spot on and told in a way that only Burl can do. Prin and he make an awesome writing team. I’m sharing this and hope that those who sparked this article in the first place may take heed. For every Published Typist you point the finger and look down to, there are 4 more Published Authors pointing their finger looking down upon you. 😉

  7. Prinnie (Post author)

    I applaud and respect anyone who writes, but embellishing the fact you are a published author is wrong. Many people don’t realize the sacrifice and very hard work just to get published. To pretend that one is more important than they are demeans that process, IMO.

  8. Burl Barer, America's Favorite Liberal

    Juney — You did a wonderful job if delineating how one of the richest countries on Earth takes care of its citizens who are stricken with cancer or other debilitating diseases — not well at all, especially as compared to the Scandinavian countries. I was once materially rich (and may be again), and then a combination of identity theft/bank fraud/divorce suddenly introduced me to the world of poverty. I learned more about America being poor than I ever learned being rich. I was just about to feel sorry for folks who are ill, widowed, orphaned, hungry, naked, ill, etc until I read this comment from a confirmed (diagnosed?) conservative: “Taking money from the productive class and giving it to the unproductive class is simply punishing people for being productive.” By unproductive class this person meant the ill, the aged, the disabled, the working poor and the unemployed poor,. the widow, the orphan, the stranger in a strange land — all those whom the Sacred Texts of the world’s diverse faiths make the #1 priority of those who agree to put themselves under that faith’s covenant. For those who cannot afford to purchase books, we have public libraries. Here is my email: Send me your address, Juney, and I’ll send you a book. You can keep it, or you can donate it to your local library.

  9. RadioDeJay

    One reason why I like what Prinnie writes is because she writes the truth and does not sugar coat it. Also she has a sense or humor. Unfortunately, people who do eventually get published have other people that go through their writing and then they tell them what can stay or what can not stay. In a way they are kind of censoring what the writer is saying.

    Prinnie keep up the good work. BTW….Congratulations

  10. Freetonia

    It’s funny to me that you wrote a blog about pseudo-experts and some idiot came and flashed her pseudo-cootch as a published author when she clearly is not published at all but a blogger herself. Hilarious! The funniest part, to defend the uber pseudo expert, Pat Brown pretend criminal profiler! Oh the lunacy…

    1. elena mitchell

      These people don’t DO irony. That is probably the difference between pseudo and real. If they don’t understand irony how can they tell if what they write about themselves is true or false? In fact why do they write complimentary things about themselves at all? That alone should set red flags flying.
      To me, my words are precious, I don’t even like crossing out a word and using another because I feel as though I have lost something. But the test lies in what others think of what I have written. This is why a lot of my typing goes unpublished, and why I’ve got loads of poetry that no one but me has ever seen.

      Pat Brown has a habit of referring to her “Profiling” as “Work”. Time she gave herself the sack if you ask me.

      PS. There is probably some irony in this, but it escapes me for the moment.

  11. RadioDeJay

    I am not a good writer and to be honest I hate to write because I am so bad. I think it is great that there are people who can do it. I tried to read Pat’s story she wrote on the McCains. It was terrible and boring. I would not recommend it to anyone. It did not catch my attention. I also am ADD and did not get diagnosed until I was an adult. I have a hard time sitting down to read so a story has to grab my attention. Hers did not do that. I would think that she shouldn’t be writing about something she has never worked on. If she wants to write she needs to write about something she solved in her so called profession. I feel that it would of made the story more personal and might of grabbed a reader’s attention. Also she needs to not be so bias.

    1. I was going to be the ADD Poster Child but I got distracted on the way to the photo shoot.
      Seriously, ADD is genetic. treatable and easily controlled. My brother and I, nephews, kids, have had our minds saved (not to mention our carpets from going around in circles) by Ritalin or Adderall. Of course you can get the same benefits by smoking meth, more or less, but you are not as likely to get arrested, robbed, or forget to brush your teeth if you use the Rx meds.

  12. elena mitchell

    The following is a copy of Post by another Not Pat Brown Fan.
    Cast of Characters.
    Gonc is the Convicted Perjurer Ex Portuguese Police Detective who ran the botched investigation. He has a lot of Domestic Disputes, when he’s not shagging someone else.
    Bennett is the Ex Disgraced Solicitor who is due in Court on charges related to Libelling and Stalking The McCanns,
    Morais is Joana Morais. Portuguese Pitch Forker Extraordinaire who funnily enough, thinks she is a Journalist.
    Forkers is short for Pitch Forkers who spend their entire lives posting horrible remarks about the family of a missing child, and baying for their blood.
    The foxyblondie/Laffinthug Ghoul Tour is a previous trip to Portugal by two particularly nasty Pitch Forkers.
    Portimao is The Police Station where they have lots of accidents with Witnesses and Stairs.
    The Post is about Pat Brown’s visit to Portugal.
    Explanations available if you haven;t got a clue of what this is all about.

    Let’s see…

    1. Arrive in the UK Tuesday morning, have a pie in a bus shelter in Windsor with Bennett.

    2. Fly to Portugal, meet Team Gonc, sleep.

    3. Meet Morais. Eat.

    4. Friday – meet Gonc himself and eat in seafood restaurant where she gets her photo taken.

    5 Weekend – travel down to Algarve – Portimao, if she was eating at Praia da Rocha. Lots of bars and seafood restaurants there; it’s figured in rather a lot of Gonc domestic disputes.

    Forkerfriends’ version – long lunch.

    Brown’s version – busy busy with reconstruction.

    What a farce! The foxyblondie/Laffinthug Ghoul Tour was much more interesting.

  13. Burl Barer, Brilliant Author.

    I have never said a bad thing about Pat Brown, and she has never said a bad thing about me. I intend to keep it that way. You gotta give the gal credit, and I give Pat full credit for the most brilliant and successful self-invention in contemporary media history. Not only did she create the character, “Profiler Pat Brown” she has managed to market and promote that character in print, radio and television. As a media guy, I admire that accomplishment. Katherine Ramsland and i were discussing the various other titles that require no accreditation, such as “Criminologist” — you can study it, take classes in it, but there is no national organization setting a standard for credentials. The same is true for Brilliant Author. Hence, I am “Brilliant Author, Burl Barer.” along with “The Standard of Charm in a Civilized Society:”

    1. Prinnie (Post author)

      I now proclaim myself boogerologist. Wait…that doesn’t sound right. LOL

  14. Freetonia

    I would have to say Burl is a very charming man. However, I do have to say that Pat Brown makes what was a very little understood and elite group of people who were designated “Profiler” status, a group who now has to defend that very term because apparently all you need is a library card to attain what was once a rarefied and highly trained person with many years of learning and experience in many fields. She isn’t a peer, she never earned her self proclaimed title but she has diminished all those who came before her and did the work and put in the real time to attain that distinction. She, is not charming in the least.

    1. elena mitchell

      She has just royally cocked up in Portugal by basing her latest ramblings on photographs she has just taken which show a scene entirely unrelated to 2007 when Madeleine was abducted because all of the trees that were shielding appartment 5A from public view have since been cut down, proving that she hasn’t looked at any of the original photos which are freely available on line.
      The trees were almost certainly cut down due to Madeleine being abducted, and because they don’t want it to happen again.
      Also one of her henchmen has proved on video that it is easy to lift the shutters by hand from outside, something previously said to be impossible by all who would rather believe that The McCanns killed their daughter.
      The trip to Portugal is so far not looking like a very good idea for Mz. Brown.

      PS. She will be heading back home to you all tomorrow, when I am sure you will all be delighted to have her back. We, of course, are delighted for you.

      PPS. Stand by for her next book. But don’t bother to buy it as her Fans will have it all over The Net in no time while they extol it’s amazing insight and virtues.

  15. Pingback: True Crime Uncensored with Burl Barer and Howard Lapides: Criminologist and Thriller Writer, Jennifer Chase « ImaginePublicity

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