I haven’t written here in awhile, and it has been spotty at best for new blog posts. Honestly, after the defamation lawsuit it kind of took the fire out of me and the commenters. Then I thought “well, maybe I have just outgrown my blog”, and upon reflection…nope, that’s not it either. I guess I was thinking that I didn’t have much to say or no one would want to read what I have to say and then I reminded myself why I started blogging in the first place: I LOVE TO WRITE. I still send snail mail (Julie, I swear — your letter is almost done LOL) and I still journal in longhand. I have notebooks lying around everywhere, and keep one in my purse. I constantly write…everywhere except here and I need to change that.

This blog started out as a spin on the name “Prinnie” which came from a shortened version of Princess that my haters called me. “Prinnie did it!!!” and then as I predicted, I would regret using the name, and here we are today - years later - and my little site still gets a gajillion hits for Steubenville stuff every day even though I’m not writing here. So, I need to change that. I am currently laid up so I am challenging myself to write (or try to write) something everyday; even if it is crap and no one wants to read it. I don’t usually share a lot of personal details about my life. Sadly, there are a few nutcases who have glommed onto my every word for the past few years and used any morsel of information as an excuse to sleuth out my real life friends or family solely for the purpose of hurting me or harassing them. Yeah, it’s pretty sick that there are adults who would behave like this, but it is one of the reasons that I have generally guarded personal information about myself and loved ones. I could write for hours about some of the things these people have done.

Anyhow…I recently had sigmoid colon resection. I had battled diverticulitis for a number of years. This past year it became literally uncontrollable. Usually I could control a flareup by watching diet and monitoring stress, but it got to the point that I was being hospitalized every month and a half or so and would be hospitalized for a week at a time to receive IV antibiotics. After my last hospitalization, it was decided that I would heal from the micro-perforations and infection, and get myself healthy enough for surgery in October. Being healthy for the surgery was important because an infection in the colon at the time of the surgery created an even higher risk of post-op infection, and the need for a colostomy bag.

Fast forward to October 5th. I had the surgery and my surgeon removed an 8″ “inflamed mass” from my sigmoid colon. He said it was really bad and he was surprised that I wasn’t sicker than I was for the past few years that I have been struggling with diverticulitis. From what I understand, I had been carrying around a low grade infection in my colon probably for years, and that would explain why I was always sick. I never felt 100% but it never stopped me from working or caring for myself. I just did it not feeling well. I’m single and there is no one here to foot the bills if I get laid up, so for me - it’s work or you’re shit out of luck.

I was in the hospital for a week before I was released home. They make you poop to go home. LOL TMI but there is no other way to delicately speak of poop. The first few days of my hospitalization are a blur as I was on a Dilaudid pump and I was hitting that button EVERY TEN MINUTES. The pain was unimaginable and even through the narcotics I was on, this pain was not going away 100%. I remember I kept telling myself if I could just get through the first 24-hours my body would start healing and I could do this. All I wanted to do was sleep, because when you sleep you don’t feel pain. It was pretty terrible and I had to reassure myself A LOT and my friends and family were so helpful in keeping me from being utterly depressed about all of this. There is no way I could have gotten through this alone. I am still not in a position that I can care for the dogs or myself, even though I’m 2-weeks post surgery. I’m still in a lot of pain and can’t drive yet because I’m on narcotics. They sewed my naval shut and the staples there are really uncomfortable. I can only sit up for short periods of time before they start hurting, but…I’m in the home stretch - they will be gone come Friday.

The title of my blog is probably perplexing, but there is a simple explanation for it. My good friend called me from his classroom last night and put me on speakerphone. He then had his English class inform me that they now refer to a semicolon as an “Alex”. I think I’m complimented…even though my colon is now English fodder. LOL

During my hospitalization, I was approached about starting a fundraiser. Usually I would never agree to such a thing. There have been times in the past where I could have benefited by asking for help, and just couldn’t bring myself to do it. I was raised poor…very poor. I had no indoor plumbing, no running water and coal/wood fuel for heat. Asking for help is more of a pride thing for me, and I have been very proud over the years. However, this time I need help. Just typing that out bothers me because I don’t like feeling vulnerable. It makes me feel weak and embarrassed - both of which a result of my hillbilly pride. But, I was asked about the fundraiser and reluctantly agreed to it. I have spent the majority of my life helping others and never blinking an eye or questioning them when I did so, and it was very hard for me to admit that I was the one that needed assistance. I am not able to work for awhile. Between consulting work I work temp jobs, and during the summer I work for Mrs. B. I am never NOT working, but am now forced to rely solely on consulting as I am in no physical shape to actually “go” to a job, and I won’t be able to do so for about a month or more depending on how quickly I heal. So, I agreed to the fundraiser. The funds will help pay rent, groceries, insurance, utilities, etc. Of course there have already been some shitty things said about it, and I expected them, but am also looking at the source of those shitty things.

Anyhow…that’s what has been happening.

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